Monday, November 17, 2008

Heavy conversations between a 7, 8 and 39 year old.

Me: "So, boys, you know how we've been hearing on the news that a lot of mommies and daddies lost their jobs this year? And remember how I said a lot of them are not going to have a lot of money to buy Christmas presents for their kids? We need to decide how we're going to help - we can adopt a family for presents this year. OR we could sponsor a family that needs food from the Mustard Seed. Or we can give smaller amounts to each and help both. AND you can help by cleaning out your playroom and weeding out the toys that you don't play with anymore and we can donate those to goodwill or the church.

Nate (T2): Mommy - what about Santa - he'll bring toys to those kids! Maybe you can call the parents and tell them not to worry, that Santa will bring their kids stuff. Then, we can give food to the hungry kids.

Walker (T1): Mom, what about God - you and grandma said that God always takes care of us. How is he taking care of those people?

I'm definitely not having a Bill Cosby moment here. Where are my words???

Nate: Isn't Santa magic?

Me: Yes.

Nate: Then he can just magically make some more toys overnight right?

Me: No, the elves do that and that takes time and materials, and he's running out of both. We'll help - that's all.

Nate: He can always go by ToysRus like he did last year.

Me: What??

Nate: You know, like last year - when we found the ToysRus bag in the garage after Christmas and you said Santa had to go there because he left one of my toys at the North Pole.


Walker: He's not real, is he?

Me: Walker - of COURSE SANTA'S REAL. What makes you think he's not real?

Walker: I meant God. Is he real? I mean is He going to help those people get food?

Me: He is helping them - God sends a message to us and tells us what to do to help them. That's how he helps - through all of us. We just have to say "ok".

Walker: How come he let them lose their jobs though?

Me: Ok, you know what? It's late, we have a tree to decorate and a train to put around the bottom of it. And you haven't had baths. Let's go - take your plates to the kitchen, put them in the sink and let's get busy having some fun, ok?

This sucks. This is how these types of conversations that should be 'learning experiences' go in my house. I start with good intentions and this is how it ends up. I don't have good answers. I fumble when pushed by a 7 year old. Where did my brain go?? When did my boys get so smart and I get so not-smart? I don't think Walker bought it. Now I've got him questioning God. I don't want him to question God - i want him to see God in everything and in everyone. I wasn't kidding, where were my words??

Are you talking to your kids about being charitable? How do you answer the tough questions?


Licha said...

I still can't figure out the answer to many of those questions for MYSELF, much less explain it to one of my kids!?!

This weekend we had to have a talk about why mommies and daddies lay naked together (after being caught of course). And then we regretted saying "because they love each other" when she crawled into bed naked WITH US!

*second runner up for parent of the year ;)*

Rose said...

If you think you're less smart than they are now, give it a few more years, dear.

I love your answer about God sending us a message. I've always told my daughter and then my granddaughters that because God is spirit, He doesn't have a physical body to use, so he uses our hands and our hearts to help others. He puts the thoughts into our hearts and gives us the gifts and talents to share with others on His behalf.

You're doing better than you think!

Carolyn...Online said...

I love that he doesn't question Santa but he has doubts about God.

If it makes you feel better this is how ALL of those well intentioned talks go with my kids too.

Diva Ma said...

You're not alone honey. When you have intellegent children you cant escape the hard questions. From my experience, you just have to take the question as they come and answer them to the best of their ability.

Good Luck!