You know how holding someone's hair when they puke makes you REALLY tight with them?

i can top it.

It's been a confusing, strange path of late - between me, the ex and the girlfriend/fiance of his. Some of which i've blogged about. A lot of which i haven't. A lot - and i mean a LOT girlfriends - of time on my knees, forgetting what time it was, praying in earnest to show me what to do and how to do it, and the strength to do it with.

It's ok.

I got to"peace".

We've talked. A lot. I found out that I really like her. Like, as in, we would probably be friends if we met up and there was no ex involved. We have glasses of wine, stories about family, jobs, and kids. And it isn't forced. It.just.is. And that's good.

But tonight - tonight it went past that.

My youngest, my Nate, my baby, is sick. Stayed home from school today with stuffy nose, headache, and sore throat.

This was his dad's day - so i went by to see him and see if he needed anything. She walked me up to his room where he was on his bed and as i sat down with the walgreen's bag in my lap on one side of him, she sat on the other.

And that is about when he turned around and projectile threw up. We're not talking baby or toddler puke. We're talking kid, chunk puke (nice visual, huh?).

As i grabbed the bag i had to hold under him - she held his forehead. She never flinched. No gag reflex action. Believe me. I watched. closely. when you haven't had kids - it's hard to stifle that. once you've had one - you hardly notice.

And when he finally settled down, he looked at me and leaned back against her.

and i thought, THAT'S the kind of person that i want backing me up when i'm not around. And as sad as it is - i can't be there every minute - but when i'm not - she will be. And that's ok.