I am officially my own worst enemy.

I got my 9 year old (10 on the 19th as if that matters) a phone for Christmas.

I knew that I would get lots of head shakes from half of our family/friends, and the other half (actually, maybe 2/3's) would not even bat an eye. That is either the perk or the curse of having V work for a cell carrier - while there is cost - it is palatable thus more of our friends' kids have cell phones in their pudgy, sticky, ten year old hands.

I did get it for a very selfish reason - i wanted to be able to call him directly without having to ring his dad's phone every time i wanted to hear his and his brother's voice. And i thought, this child never really asks for anything (unlike his brother), and this one thing he has asked for all year. We even gave him a dummy model back in the summer that i had used in retail when i worked for Sprint and told him that if he could produce the phone every time i asked and it wasn't destroyed or lost - we might consider getting him one for Christmas.

It was the one thing that wasn't lost or detroyed this year. huh.

Fast forward to today. So far:

1. He has called me from his bedroom to talk to my while I'm in the kitchen.
2. Called his dad NUMEROUS times while watching bowl games so that they can 'watch together'.
3. Taken some very unflattering pictures of all of us for his contacts so that these pictures can be enjoyed by all every time one of us decides to call him.
4. Texted me from the couch while i'm in the same.room.
5. Calls and checks his minutes balance so much Sprint is going to call him back and ask him to stop.
6. and the final straw - he googled my name and found ALL OF MY POSTS AND HAS BEEN READING THEM OUT LOUD TO THOSE THAT SHOULDN'T HEAR ALL OF WHAT I'VE BEEN BLOGGING. Why he never did that on the laptop i don't know and it's a mute point now.
   

So. How to deal. how to deal. Delete old posts or say "Screw it. Those are my words and were honestly portraying how I felt at the time."

Meet me under the mistletoe...I have some children I'd like to give you.

"Get your shoes on, i have some errands to run."

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH MOOOOOOOOM I don't want to run errands."

"Get in the car."

"I HATE ERRANDS. I HATE SHOPPING. Why can't i stay here???"

"Get in the car."

"But MOOOOOMMMMM - I..."

"I SAID GET IN THE FRIGGIN CAR. NOW. NOT TOMORROW. NOT 10 SECONDS FROM NOW. NOOOOOOOOOOOW."

"I'm gonna tell Dad - you said the F word!".

sigh.

"Quit ramming the cart into your brother."

"Stop touching your brother."

"Don't SAY THAT WORD."

"I SAID DON'T SAY THAT WORD."

"Don't pick up that box. It's glass."

"CLEAN UP ON AISLE 3. BRING BROOM AND DUSTPAN."

sigh.

"I want THIS for Christmas."

"Can i get it NOW?"

"Why?? PLEEEEEAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSE???"

"YOU NEVER LET ME GET ANYTHING AT THE STORE."

"I WANT TO GO HOME!!!!!"

me too.

"I LOVE CHRISTMAS, IT'S SO MUCH FUN. RIGHT MOM??"

"ABSO-FREAKIN-LUTELY"

truly.

You know how holding someone's hair when they puke makes you REALLY tight with them?

i can top it.

It's been a confusing, strange path of late - between me, the ex and the girlfriend/fiance of his. Some of which i've blogged about. A lot of which i haven't. A lot - and i mean a LOT girlfriends - of time on my knees, forgetting what time it was, praying in earnest to show me what to do and how to do it, and the strength to do it with.

It's ok.

I got to"peace".

We've talked. A lot. I found out that I really like her. Like, as in, we would probably be friends if we met up and there was no ex involved. We have glasses of wine, stories about family, jobs, and kids. And it isn't forced. It.just.is. And that's good.

But tonight - tonight it went past that.

My youngest, my Nate, my baby, is sick. Stayed home from school today with stuffy nose, headache, and sore throat.

This was his dad's day - so i went by to see him and see if he needed anything. She walked me up to his room where he was on his bed and as i sat down with the walgreen's bag in my lap on one side of him, she sat on the other.

And that is about when he turned around and projectile threw up. We're not talking baby or toddler puke. We're talking kid, chunk puke (nice visual, huh?).

As i grabbed the bag i had to hold under him - she held his forehead. She never flinched. No gag reflex action. Believe me. I watched. closely. when you haven't had kids - it's hard to stifle that. once you've had one - you hardly notice.

And when he finally settled down, he looked at me and leaned back against her.

and i thought, THAT'S the kind of person that i want backing me up when i'm not around. And as sad as it is - i can't be there every minute - but when i'm not - she will be. And that's ok.